If I Had Known (Dean x reader)
by addictedtomtdew8
Summary: Reader dies and Dean laments over the fact he didn't get to say goodbye I was listening to If I knew by Every Avenue and this came to me. It's alittle morbid I must admit.


Dean's P.O.V  
You were dead and it was all my fault.

I should have been faster, paying more attention.

I should have made you stay home.

-A few hours earlier  
A gang of demons had caught you guys unaware. You had thought a skin walker was hiding out in the abandoned building, instead it was 6 demons.

Dean and Sam were fighting four demons on the other side. You had dispatched one of the demons. You had a demon pinned and were getting ready to use the knife on her when you felt someone grab you. You felt a burning sensation before the front and back of your shirt got wet and sticky.

You looked down to see a knife protruding from your stomach. You felt the person behind you pull out the knife. You pressed your hands against the wound, trying to slow the blood pouring out. You felt yourself being turned around and looking into the black eyes of the demon you thought you had killed.

A smile was on their face as the licked the knife.

You dropped to your knees before falling over. You heard someone yell your name before you slipped into darkness.

You came awake to someone shaking you, telling you to wake up.

"y/n, you have to wake up, please." You heard Dean telling you, almost pleadingly.

"D..Dean." You managed to get out between coughs and gasps.

"Y/n. I need you to stay awake. "

"No, I'm so tired." You mumbled.

Sam knelt next to you and grabbed one of your hands. His felt unnaturally warm to you or maybe you were just cold. "It's going to be alright."

You let out a strangled laugh. "We both know it isn't going to be alright."

You squeezed his hand. "Sammy, I love you. You have to promise to look after Dean. Please." You looked up at him, tears filling your eyes.

"I promise." He said, reaching up to wipe the tears gathered in his eyes.

You turned to Dean. You could feel the beating of your heart slowing down, it was getting harder to breath, but you had to do this one last thing. You turned to Dean.  
Wincing at the pain that shot through your body, you placed a hand on his cheek, feeling the wetness covering it. Looking up at the man you loved more than anything in the world, you gave him a smile.

"I love you Dean. I'm sorry wasn't more careful."

You managed to get out before your hand fell away from him. Your eyes fluttered shut, your body giving a small spasm as you took your last breath.

-Earlier that day—  
You were sitting at the table, laptop open in front of you. Sam was sitting on the couch, waiting on Dean to get out of the bathroom. You guys were getting ready for a hunt.  
You let out a sigh, closing the laptop. You had never hunted a skin walker before and you were a little nervous. Sam had prepped you and let you know everything he had known.  
You felt a warm pair of arms wrap around you. You tilted to your head up to look in the face of your boyfriend Dean. You guys had been dating for the past year. "Hey baby." He said, placing a kiss on your forehead.

"You guys ready?" Sam asked as he stood up.

"Yep." You muttered, standing up and forcing Dean to let go of you.

You grabbed your jacket and put it on. You felt Dean slip his arms around your waist from behind. You turned so you were facing him.

"I think you should stay. I have a bad feeling." Dean looked down at you, his green eyes watching you with a look of apprehension

"Dean. It's going to be fine. This isn't my first rodeo." You said, bringing a smile to his face.

"She's right." Sam said, throwing on his jacket.

"Butt out Sam." Dean gave Sam a look before looking back at you.

"I'll be careful. Promise." You gave him a smile and pressed a soft kiss against his lips. "I love you Dean." You mumbled against his lips.

"I love you too y/n." Dean replied returning your kiss. He hugged you tightly, placing a kiss on top of your head.

-Dean's P.O.V.—

If I had known that would be the last time I had held you, kissed you or seen you smile. I would have made sure to let you know how much you mean to me. I would have made the kiss last longer. I would have held you tighter.


End file.
